Thursday, March 6, 2008

The Flood

I have such a funny marriage. Noah lives in my house. Why Noah? Well, because of the spontaneous flood.

We were puttering around the house getting a few chores done and preparing to leave to meet our friends for coffee. I was in the office sending out an invoice while my sweetheart was tossing in a load of laundry.

Suddenly I hear a scream, some banging about, and he's calling out to me. Oh no! I thought he had hurt himself, so I sprang up and ran out of the office and past the dining room. Splash, squish, splash. The carpet was soaked.

He had managed to stop the onslaught of water from the rebel washing machine and was splashing water toward the kitchen with his bare hands. "Towels! We need towels! Bring me all the towels!"

I ran to secure the artillery and returned with four large specimens. But, alas, it wasn't enough. The water kept creeping and sprawling, taking over our home. First it spread toward the living room. Then our bedroom. We were fighting a battle on three fronts.

"There's no time!" It was like a scene out of Saving Private Ryan. He took the dirty close bin and dumped it into the pool of water. Everything went in. Nothing dry was spared.

I ran to his aid pulling the wet pieces of cloth from the battle scene. In the kitchen I did what I could to save them--red towels in one corner white shirts in the other--we worked desperately to stop the bleeding.

Everything seemed hopeless. Then, in a moment of genius, he remembered the supersoak towels he bought on an impulse. We now had a secret weapon. He soaked, I wrung them out in the kitchen and tossed them back, he soaked some more. For 40 minutes and 40 seconds we toiled.

In the end, technological superiority saved the day, and we could forgo building the ark.


  1. Man, I really don't want to be THAT GUY who points out typos, but you made a pretty funny one: "sweat heart". Just what exactly is required to achieve the title of "sweat heart"? :-)

  2. Ha ha ha ha ha! Too funny. I corrected the "sweat" to "sweet" typo, but now you've given me a whole new angle to contemplate. What does it take to be a sweat heart? I guess sweating like crazy trying to contain the flood!


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